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Search results for tag #humor

[?]Global Museum » 🌐
@globalmuseum@mastodon.online

Public holiday declared after Trump’s state fair attendance reaches double figures.
@newsthump

Public holiday declared after Trump’s state fair attendance reaches double figures

Alt...Public holiday declared after Trump’s state fair attendance reaches double figures

    [?]Tadonic the Flautulent » 🌐
    @ubuntourist@mastodon.social

    Photoshopped image of the curtain covering the Kennedy Center entrance where Donald Trump's name was removed. The curtain now bears the text: "Donald J. Trump Memorial Butthurt Curtain".

    Alt...Photoshopped image of the curtain covering the Kennedy Center entrance where Donald Trump's name was removed. The curtain now bears the text: "Donald J. Trump Memorial Butthurt Curtain".

      CurtAdams boosted

      [?]Nick East (Indie Writer) » 🌐
      @NickEast_IndieWriter@mastodon.art

      When someone asks, "What is it?" and someone else answers, "It's a mystery!" I sincerly hope this is what they're talking about 😂

      @reading @bookstodon @books @humor@fedigroups.social @humor@lemmy.world @aiop



      Photo of a bookself with a sign saying, "Mystery" and all the books around with the title towards the shelf. Caption: Well played, bookstore, well played.

      Alt...Photo of a bookself with a sign saying, "Mystery" and all the books around with the title towards the shelf. Caption: Well played, bookstore, well played.

        🇮🇲Dan boosted

        [?]Ingrid Hoeben Ⓥ 🇧🇪 » 🌐
        @IngridHbn@mastodon.online

        simple and creative

        woman in white shirt and pink shorts is sitting on a beach. There's a piece of clothing next to her but the trompe l'oeil makes it looks like she is floating above a shadow. she also pretends to be praying.

        Alt...woman in white shirt and pink shorts is sitting on a beach. There's a piece of clothing next to her but the trompe l'oeil makes it looks like she is floating above a shadow. she also pretends to be praying.

        woman in white shirt and pink shorts is lying and resting on a beach. There's a piece of clothing next to her but the trompe l'oeil makes it looks like she is floating above a shadow. She has a brown hat on her tummy.

        Alt...woman in white shirt and pink shorts is lying and resting on a beach. There's a piece of clothing next to her but the trompe l'oeil makes it looks like she is floating above a shadow. She has a brown hat on her tummy.

          [?]WIST Quotations » 🌐
          @wistquotes@friendica.world

          A quotation from Jean Kerr

          I have two trifling ambitions in the theater: to make a lot of people laugh and to make a lot of money.

          Jean Kerr (1922-2003) American author and playwright [b. Bridget Jean Collins]
          Interview (1955-07), Theatre Arts magazine

          More about this quote: wist.info/kerr-jean/84710/

            [?]🍂 Aesthetic Femboy :pumpkinpepe: » 🌐
            @AestheticFemboy@retro-gaiden.com

            send this meme to anyone who is not ditching windows

              [?]Global Museum » 🌐
              @globalmuseum@mastodon.online

              Ghostbusters mistake reflecting pool water for ectoplasmic residue.

              The Ghostbusters have mistaken the green algae in the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool for ectoplasmic residue, Ray Stantz has revealed.

              "“The trip wasn’t a complete waste of time, though. We spotted a massive, orange Class 5 Full Roaming Vapor with tiny hands walking up and down the White House garden"

              archive.ph/lEn84

              Algae in the the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool

              Alt...Algae in the the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool

                [?]Project Gutenberg » 🌐
                @gutenberg_org@mastodon.social

                Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? The History Behind the World's Most Famous Joke

                The world's best-known joke has roots in 19th-century humor—and may have pioneered a form of comedy now known as anti-humor.

                mentalfloss.com/history/why-di

                Two chickens crossing a gravel road. The one closest to the camera is fluffy and light grey. The other one is light brown and has tan plumage.

                Alt...Two chickens crossing a gravel road. The one closest to the camera is fluffy and light grey. The other one is light brown and has tan plumage.

                  [?]Global Museum » 🌐
                  @globalmuseum@mastodon.online

                  🤣 HUMOUR SPOT🤣
                  A cartoon by Jonathan Rosen in the New Yorker

                  Cartoon by Jonathan Rosen. New Yorker

                  Alt...Cartoon by Jonathan Rosen. New Yorker

                    Vassil Nikolov | Васил Николов boosted

                    [?]Darth Hideout 🏳️‍🌈🎃 [he/him/his] » 🌐
                    @darth_hideout@mas.to

                    Maybe if the switched from Prime Ministers to Fibonacci Ministers, the intervals between them wouldn't be so short.

                      [?]WIST Quotations » 🌐
                      @wistquotes@friendica.world

                      A quotation from Horace

                      For ridicule shall frequently prevail,
                      And cut the knot, when graver reasons fail.
                       
                                                    [Ridiculum acri
                      Fortius et melius magnas plerumque secat res.]

                      Horace (65–8 BC) Roman poet, satirist, soldier, politician [Quintus Horatius Flaccus]
                      Satires [Saturae, Sermones], Book 1, # 10 “Nempe incomposito,” l. 14ff (1.10.14-15) (35 BC) [tr. Francis (1747)]

                      More about (and translations of) this quote: wist.info/horace/1955/

                        muddle 🥣 boosted

                        [?]Mark A. Rayner » 🌐
                        @markarayner@mas.to

                        Weird horse having a casual Sunday rest, looking fabulous.

                        white borzio dog lying on a colorful flower-patterened coutch

                        Alt...white borzio dog lying on a colorful flower-patterened coutch

                          screwlisp boosted

                          [?]Quasit » 🌐
                          @Quasit@beige.party

                          Cold writing take [SENSITIVE CONTENT]

                          @mdhughes @glitzersachen @screwlisp @Binder

                          "Cosmic Laughter" (1974) is a collection of some wonderfully funny science fiction short stories. It was once is my fault recommendations a few weeks ago: kolektiva.social/@Quasit/11668

                          And R. Bretnor wrote a lot of very funny short science fiction too. "The Schimmelhorn File" (1979) is a collection of short stories about a Swiss janitor who is a genius—but only in his subconscious. Fair warning, Papa Schimmelhorn starts out as a dirty old man and just gets worse and worse.

                          archive.org/details/schimmelho

                          Another character who's a genius only in his subconscious (and generally wakes up from a bender with mysterious inventions that he doesn't understand) is Henry Kuttner's Galloway Gallagher. Many Gallagher stories were collected in "Robots Have No Tails" (1952).

                          Gallagher is, I should note, an alcoholic.

                          archive.org/details/robotshave

                            [?]Guillotine Jones, Flâneur » 🌐
                            @Guillotine_Jones@beige.party

                            One of my firmly held religious beliefs is that since the 20th century, Great Britain has been punching above its weight in comedy.
                            That's because the people's daily life is so dreadful, and their governments have done such awful things, and still, some of them can make others laugh.
                            By that criteria, though, the Scots clearly must be world champions.

                              [?]Global Museum » 🌐
                              @globalmuseum@mastodon.online

                              RFK Jnr uses Ivermectin to ‘cure’ green reflecting pool.
                              Witnesses described Kennedy arriving shortly after dawn with several industrial-sized buckets labelled “Ivermectin” and immediately beginning what officials later described as “an entirely unsanctioned public health intervention”.
                              “The pool is sick,” Kennedy told reporters while emptying a fifth bucket into the murky water.
                              newsthump.com/2026/06/17/rfk-j

                              US Health Secretary Robert F Kennedy Jr has been spotted pouring buckets of ivermectin into Washington’s algae-infested Reflecting Pool after becoming convinced the anti-parasitic drug could cure “aquatic greenness”.

                              Alt...US Health Secretary Robert F Kennedy Jr has been spotted pouring buckets of ivermectin into Washington’s algae-infested Reflecting Pool after becoming convinced the anti-parasitic drug could cure “aquatic greenness”.

                                [?]Global Museum » 🌐
                                @globalmuseum@mastodon.online

                                I’’,Jsut Triend Someting Callesd Artefficial Ingellengents And Le’ts Just Say I Will Not Be Using Rengular Ingellengents Ever Agian!! , (By Queen Elizabeth II)

                                clickhole.com/ijsut-triend-som

                                  [?]Brian Sletten » 🌐
                                  @bsletten@mastodon.social

                                  After all this time looking for it!

                                  A beach by a lake in the mountains. Blue sky, trees, pretty water. In the foreground there are the remnants of a tree trunk on its side. Roots are exposed. There are two prominent branches at 90 degrees that have another 90 degree turn in each direction to meet back up in what appears to be a natural rectanglish shape. The text says, “I finally found it… the square root”.

                                  Alt...A beach by a lake in the mountains. Blue sky, trees, pretty water. In the foreground there are the remnants of a tree trunk on its side. Roots are exposed. There are two prominent branches at 90 degrees that have another 90 degree turn in each direction to meet back up in what appears to be a natural rectanglish shape. The text says, “I finally found it… the square root”.

                                    JulesJones boosted

                                    [?]Mark A. Rayner » 🌐
                                    @markarayner@mas.to

                                    This is the last thing you see before something bad happens.

                                    close up of a swan on a beach

                                    Alt...close up of a swan on a beach

                                      [?]Woodoo Prod » 🌐
                                      @WoodooProd@mastodon.cloud

                                      Can't find something about it, but very humorous

                                      Can't find something about it, but very humorous A cow abducting an UFO

                                      Alt...Can't find something about it, but very humorous A cow abducting an UFO

                                        john fink ok!! :ghost: boosted

                                        [?]Dave Rahardja (temporarily spooky) » 🌐
                                        @drahardja@sfba.social

                                        I love this comic. Unfortunately I don’t know who made it!

                                        There are SO MANY people here in Silicon Valley who I *know* can afford to swap out their Tesla, yet they refuse to sell it and stick these stickers on instead. All of them are complicit.

                                        A comic of stickers on Tesla cars, in increasingly desperate tones: “Anti Elon Tesla Club”, “No Elon”, “I bought this before Elon went crazy”, “Vintage Tesla Pre-Madness Edition”, “Absolve me”, “ABSOLVE ME”, “TELL ME I’M GOOD”, “TELL ME I’M NOT TO BLAME”

                                        Alt...A comic of stickers on Tesla cars, in increasingly desperate tones: “Anti Elon Tesla Club”, “No Elon”, “I bought this before Elon went crazy”, “Vintage Tesla Pre-Madness Edition”, “Absolve me”, “ABSOLVE ME”, “TELL ME I’M GOOD”, “TELL ME I’M NOT TO BLAME”

                                          [?]Tadonic the Flautulent » 🌐
                                          @ubuntourist@mastodon.social

                                          CARTOON: A woman opening a door marked "EXIT". Next to her, a man, hand to forhead, eyes fluttering, opening a door marked "DRAMATIC EXIT"

                                          Alt...CARTOON: A woman opening a door marked "EXIT". Next to her, a man, hand to forhead, eyes fluttering, opening a door marked "DRAMATIC EXIT"

                                            2 ★ 1 ↺

                                            [?]OCTADE » 🌐
                                            @octade@soc.octade.net

                                            Impeachment for high crimes and misdemeanours?

                                            Maybe it means one must be high on spirits during the crime ...

                                            ... or the crimes were committed while high?

                                            If Drumpf had a son he would look like Afroman ...

                                            ... because he got high.

                                            Drumpf + Afroman = High Crimes and Misdemeanours.

                                            IMPEACH AFROMAN

                                            Mandatory Brawndo dosage is the contraceptive antidote.


                                            Tryptich of Afroman wearing an American flag striped suit.

                                            Alt...Tryptich of Afroman wearing an American flag striped suit.

                                              2 ★ 1 ↺

                                              [?]OCTADE » 🌐
                                              @octade@soc.octade.net

                                              Bytemology of Retronym, OCTADE. Yinzer phonics. Butterfly Perfume.

                                              OCTADE or OCTAD is a retro word that means either an octal digit of three bits, or an octal octet or an eight-bit byte. Thus an octade, depending on its historical use, is either 3 bits or 8 bits.

                                              OCTADE was used to specify eight bits, as opposed to BYTE which is not necessarily eight bits as the word BYTE could signify any of several numbers of bits.

                                              This yields the retro 1337 numbers of 38 and 83. The number 38 is one more than 37 so a bit more elite a bit cooler. Thus it owns cardinally shorter byterz.

                                              83 mod 38 equals 7, the highest octal digit. 838 mod 383 equals 72 or 9 times 8 which is 8 squared plus 8.

                                              8338 mod 3883 equals 572 which is 72 times 8 minus 4 or 71.5 times 8.

                                              8383 mod 3838 equals 707 which is 88 times 8 plus 3.

                                              I prefer the old word OCTADE to the word BYTE. OCTADE sports a Euro-peon dignity and gravitas like an Internet serf ready to surf the worknet like pwnd peons. This is very true when pronouncing OCTADE with a thick Pennsyltucky Dutch or Yinzer accent. The Bostonian pronunciation sounds like bad beginner German or muffled mumbling of 'lactate.'

                                              OCTADE or OCTAD was also used to describe a poem of eight stanzas.

                                              OCTADE was also used to describe a period of eight years, or two leap years.

                                              OCTADECANAL is a pheromone found in butterflies. It is butterfly perfume. I would not wear butterfly cologne. But I would sell it. Who would buy and wear my snobby smell? With wordplay we can call it OCTADE CHANNEL No. 8 . All rights reserved, ye French odor snooties.

                                              Historical references for use of 'octade' or 'octad':

                                              Burroughs B5500 Information Processing Systems REFERENCE MANUAL
                                              https://bitsavers.trailing-edge.com/pdf/burroughs/LargeSystems/B5000_5500_5700/1021326_B5500_RefMan_196705.pdf

                                              Philips Data Systems Product Range - April 1971
                                              https://www.vintage-calculators.nl/Philips%20productoverzicht%201971.pdf

                                              Is there another name for octet that means 8 bits?
                                              https://www.quora.com/Is-there-another-name-for-octet-that-means-8-bits

                                              @wordplay@lemmy.ml @Vocabulary@lemmy.ml

                                              --

                                              OCTADE | news://alt.flashback | https://soc.octade.net

                                                3 ★ 0 ↺

                                                [?]OCTADE » 🌐
                                                @octade@soc.octade.net

                                                A snake is a stomach with fangs (and a spoon-shaped head).

                                                Snakes exist just to eat.


                                                  3 ★ 2 ↺
                                                  Politics Channel boosted

                                                  [?]OCTADE » 🌐
                                                  @octade@soc.octade.net

                                                  AFROMAN FOR PRESIDENT


                                                  Tryptich photograph of Afroman wearing a red and white striped suit with blue fields of white stars like the American flag.

                                                  Alt...Tryptich photograph of Afroman wearing a red and white striped suit with blue fields of white stars like the American flag.

                                                    0 ★ 1 ↺

                                                    [?]OCTADE » 🌐
                                                    @octade@soc.octade.net

                                                    In a battle of wits my enemy is a mixed-up martial fartist.

                                                    Huff it, fart muffin!


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